Week I don’t even know anymore

It’s official: I am down 30 pounds overall. I haven’t done my measurements yet.

I haven’t had that kind of success. Ever. It feels really good. And I’ve done it in such a way that I’ve really worked on retraining my brain to make healthier choices with my food, while also trying to be more physically whenever possible.

Have I stayed 100% true every single day to the nutrition and exercise plans? Absolutely not. There have been too many recipes I haven’t liked and too many days that I just haven’t had the time to squeeze in the workouts (I don’t care what the advertising says — it takes more than 20-something minutes). Especially during the GI nightmare that swept through my house and then the surgical recovery period for the boys that pretty much immediately followed.

But 30. Freaking. Pounds.

Putting it mildly: Mommy has had a really hard time lately and we are all just lucky that I survived and only told one of my kids to f— off once. But he threw a perfectly good homemade burrito on the floor after specifically asking for it and that was just the straw that broke the camel’s back that day.

Anyway, despite all of those challenges, or perhaps thanks to the GI bug pushing my over my plateau (hah!), I continued on my journey and made it a milestone I haven’t seen in a really long time. I checked in at under 170 pounds this morning. That’s just absolutely amazing to me.

Where it started

I talk a lot about the fitness and nutrition program I was on before I got pregnant, and the success I found with that. If I’m remembering correctly, the lowest I got there was about 175 pounds. That was still pretty good for me. Of course, then I turned around and got pregnant with twins and got up to 210 pounds before hatching them from the baby forge.

And that’s just about where I was when I started trying to turn things around for myself. I got on the scale at an urgent when I was fighting a bad sinus infection or something and it horrified me: 199 pounds. And there were no babies growing inside of me. That was just not OK with me. I had to do something.

The first 10 pounds I managed to get off on my own, but it was really difficult and I kept going back to making bad choices. So we moved the elliptical and I tried that for a bit. Everything worked for very short periods, but nothing was sticking. Nothing was making my brain switch gears. That’s when I found Body Boss.

How my brain works now

I pushed myself to try everything at least once for the first few weeks and really stick to the exercise routine. I really needed to stop trusting myself to make choices and trust the experts who put these guides together if I was going get my brain to change the way it worked. And it finally happened.

I can have cheats and not go crazy and tank the whole day. Or week. I had a burrito the size of my head yesterday and I still kept within my goals for the day. That’s fairly monumental for me. It used to be that if I had like one cheat thing – a cookie or something – then I would just call the whole day a wash and go crazy. Then, of course, if that day is shot, and it’s close enough to the end of the week, I might as well just forget the whole rest of the week, too.

Amazing.

Oh, hello confidence

The other part of all this? I’ve gotten my confidence back. I dropped a couple sizes and feel good enough to start dressing cute again on my days off. I bought some yellow jeans, which I used to have a long time ago but sold because there was just no way I was ever going to fit into them again. So it’s great to feel good enough about myself again to want to go shopping. Beyond that, to feel like I can actually take the time to try things on in the store without shame.

It really is just amazing what a physical change can do for you mentally. Y’all know that I struggle in both departments and having success in one department seriously helps in the other.

Published by laura.gaton

I'm a mom to twin boys, wife to someone just as nerdy as me, and a recovering journalist. I've found new life in becoming a veterinary technician assistant.